Sunday, May 24, 2009

Stop Discouraging New Parents - Seriously, Get a Better Hobby.

So I'm mad. This weekend has been a disaster for various reasons, involving a yelling husband, a lost chipmunk, and way more work than I can shake a pointy stick at. But even though I'm thoroughly discouraged and want to give up, I think I'll just rant about something that REALLY bothers me - people who see that I'm pregnant and feel the need to share how absolutely HORRIBLE parenting is.

Why the heck do people feel the need to share their "advice" on how I will never sleep again or have time to myself or - for the love of all that is good - even enjoy life anymore? It makes me just want to stick a fork in my eye. Seriously, I've only had TWO people tell me anything positive about being a parent my entire pregnancy, so thanks to everyone else, I am fully prepared to hate every minute of it. I am now thoroughly aware that I will always resent my kid for the freedom she takes from me and that I will never experience joy again. Thank you, most everyone.

Since we're dishing out free advice, I now have some advice to parents: when talking to someone who is pregnant, if you don't have something good or encouraging to say about parenting, SHUT UP. Seriously. What mature pregnant woman DOESN'T know that her life will be turned upside down and that her nights will be sleepless and her days full of sacrifice? Maybe you may need to share these realities with your own pregnant teenage daughter, but not with me, nor with most mature women.

But even though I've waited to have kids, I'm still scared about a million things, and the negative advice doesn't help any. It has just given me a new fear: that not only will I fail miserably at all aspects of parenting, I will also hate and resent every minute of it. If that was your goal, negative people, then rock on. You did it.

So instead of telling your pregnant friends all of your parenting horror stories, how about some feedback about the things you love about parenting? Nobody mentions those things to pregnant women. It might just help balance out all the negativity we receive.


Anonymous said...

Well said.

In case I said anything bad, I'm sorry.

I think babies and pregnant women are very cute. :-)


Echoesofstars said...

No, not you M. :) You really do rock. :)